Friday, November 04, 2005

crossroad of life

Dropouts

School is starting to take its toll on me. I'm taking more classes now than I have in recent years. I'm enrolled in 5 courses, and I haven't done that since my first year... when I failed my first class ever: Intro Chemistry 1. There are currently four classes in which I'm enrolled that I can handle. The fifth isn't going too well. Previous posts in my blog point in the direction of that class, Algorithm Analysis. I've discussed it before. With a course-load of five classes I feel I've had to choose one that I must sacrifice. The smart thing to do would to have not taken the course at all and spared myself the failing grade. Instead, I'm enrolled in it, doing the best I can with the available resources. I'm learning in the class, don't get me wrong. I'm picking up enough information that in the case I need to repeat the class, I'll know enough to get that passing grade. But currently, it's too tough when compared to my other classes. Multivariable Calculus is tough, too, but I'm putting lots of effort in that class to ensure a pass. It's better to complete Calculus with a passing grade and fail Algorithms than to put as much effort into both classes and fail both of them, right? Neither class is a requisite to any other classes I'll be taking, so I'm aiming for a 55% or better. I say 55% because any average overall grade lower than that and the student is put on academic probation. Fail to bring your overall average higher than that at the next semester end and you're out of school for a semester. Do it again and you're out a year. Or something like that. Which brings me to my next topic of discussion. Dropouts.

Most well known of the worlds dropouts from school is this man, Bill Gates. Famous for not completing his degree at Harvard, and going on to develop the (unfortunately) most popular operating system for computers. Another you might have heard of is Steve Jobs, the guy who brought you the iPod, and many other Apple products. And how about Steve Wozniak? The brain and engineer behind the Apple computer.

There is a theme here, they are all figureheads in the computer technology world. I, in no way, am touting myself as a future figurehead in the world of computer technology. I'll be happy with a solid position in a game development company as design guy. I'm just tired of school now, it's weighing down on me. I've been going to school for 3 years already, I've failed two classes. I've repeated them and passed. I've covered computer science, english, philosophy, or at least the basics therein.

I have an Algorithms midterm this coming Monday. I have a 4-part (6 to 8 page) essay due in Philosophy by Wednesday. I have another test in Multivariable calculus on Thursday. Instead of studying for any of them or writing my essay I'd rather read game-design theory or flesh out the ground-work for my games. I'd rather spend an hour reading reviews for newly released games, on either PC, console or handheld/mobile, finding out what worked for them and what doesn't. This school hasn't taught me game design (well, maybe it has this semester with Dr. Allen Paeth's Modelling and Simulation class). Nobody here wants to teach me what I want to learn.

I'll get to my essay now. I've got the weekend to write it and study for my Algorithms class. I'll do the best I can for Algorithms, if that even means putting off the essay until Monday night. I'm in no way intentionally sabotaging any of my classes. Just with a course-load as I have, I'm having a hard time making time for everything that needs to be done and attention payed to. That last part refers to my girlfriend, whom I seem to be neglecting this semester as school has taken priority. I don't know how other people do it. I'm sure I'll know how by the end of the semester, though. I'm only enrolled in 4 classes next semester.

-Not dropping out, I'm not smart enough for that.

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